I use people. Not in a malicious way, but in the way an addict abuses their substance of choice. People are my vice—men specifically. I crave the emotional high they give me with a unique and reckless disregard for my own well-being—eagerly floating into an unsustainable euphoria, knowing full well that after every high comes an equal, if not more powerful, plummet into a devastating abyss. But like every junkie, I crawl willingly back into the arms of my demons.
Oh, the price we pay to feel loved. We’d all sell our souls to the devil himself for that. Perhaps I have already.
They say that acknowledging that you have a problem is one of the first steps to recovery. Well, in that case, my name is Charleston Smith and I have a fucking problem.
*ARC provided for an honest review*
Mmmh, I am very conflicted about this book. I started it expecting romance and got a lot of something else entirely instead. Charleston is a peculiar main character; she’s dealt with a lot in her life, the loss of her brother to addictions, just a little while after her first love left her without saying goodbye, or anything at all. Since then, she’s never been able to really open up to a romantic relationship, she’s just been “using” men. I really liked that she’s so confident and proud, and self-assured, especially when it comes to work. But there’s this void that threatens to swallow her whole behind this toughness.
There isn’t one guy, not even two; there are three guys contending Charleston’s attention! One being her first love, Dean, conveniently showing up to work at her condo. Here’s where I was disappointed; I don’t feel like I know any of these guys. The book is completely centered on Charleston, which is good in a way, since it’s her story, it’s her journey towards happiness and acceptance. But on the other end, I wasn’t connected at all with the love side of the story. I mean, I could only hope she’d end up with Dean because I felt their connection more. The unconventional way in which the book ended would have been a lot better, in my opinion, if we’d had a stronger connection to these guys.
In the end, though, this was a good book, very emotional and heartfelt. It could be really helpful for people who’ve dealt or are dealing with addiction, or the loss of someone due to an addiction. And I really appreciate how the author put all of herself into this. It was truly inspiring.